Looking for a writer to punch up your speech, contribute to your stand-up act, or collaborate on other ventures, then look no further than Round Table.
Round Table readers are dedicated students of comedy who are serious about learning and improving their writing talents. Many RT students have gone on to prosperous writing careers, have won Emmy Awards, and have taken their hobby into a full-time career.
Here are some of the Round Table writers who are available for hire. If interested, contact the writers directly for availability, additional sample material, and fees.
Charlie Adams
Charlie was happily writing gags, one-liners, put downs and smart comebacks for many of the UK's biggest TV and radio comedians when show business closed down and nobody told him. Now he has clients performing to US audiences on cruise ships and he'd like to reach further into that market with his daily topical joke service. Contact him at ca@charlieadams.co.uk.
Sample of Charlie's work: If you remember nothing else, remember this; a joke has the power to offend, to hurt and wound...great isn't it?
Financial dispair is international right now. My bank manager came to see me the other day. He said, "How about lunch?" Well, I wasn't hungry but I bought a couple of sandwiches off him anyway.
They've got this Sarah Palin action toy. It doesn't cry or anything but if you so much as touch its hair, you hear the KERRCHICK of a bullet entering a chamber. I put it on the table beside my cooling turkey...the cat won't go near it.
Doug Davern
Doug is a London based writer who has been studying and writing comedy for a number of years. He enjoys writing both sketch comedy and stand-up. Before choosing a career in comedy, Doug worked as a Bank Manager and is experienced with working to deadline and writing comedy as part of a team. He is keen to work internationally, passionate about his comedy and delighted to be involved with Round Table. Doug can be reached at dougdavern@yahoo.co.uk.
Sample of Doug's writing: Before being executed by a firing squad, the condemned man was asked if he'd like a blindfold. He nervously replied, "Yes, please, one for each marksman."
During last night's windstorm, somebody broke the World's Record for a Hundred Metre Sprint. It was an old lady who refused to let go of her umbrella.
Women's tennis skirts are becoming shorter and shorter. Eventually Wimbledon will only be seen on the Playboy Channel.
Mel Loftus
Mel has sold humor to people like Robert ORben, Phyllis Diller, and Joan Rivers to name a few. He is also the published author of "You Know You're A Workaholic If..." and has been pulbishe in national publications like Reader's Digest, The Wall Street Journal, and Modern Maturity. Mel can be reached at melloftus@aol.com or at 903 Dana Lane, Holmen, WI 54636.
Sample of Mel's writing: It's football season again and time for all of us to remember: it's not whether you win or lose, but how you play the point spread.
I lost everything in my divorce; now I don't even know whose wall my back is against, but it is likely that my wife's lawyer owns one third of it.
Bill Mihalic
After escaping the automotive industry, Bill launched h is comedy writing career and now provides current event jokes, monologues, sketches, and speeches. His material is featured regularly by Tom Ryan of WOMC in Detroit and Kevin Ferguson, host of TV’s Night Shift. He has had his lines used by Jay Leno. His website is www.highimpacthumor.com and he can be reached at wmihalic@aol.com
Samples of Bill’s work: Oprah Winfrey recently gave her staff an all-expense paid Hawaiian vacation. Dr. Phil, on the other hand, only gave his employees a free guilt trip.
Because of a lockout of paper industry workers in Finland, shoppers there are hoarding toilet paper, causing stores to run out of the product. People who weren’t in time to buy a supply of toilet paper are now stocking up on Imodium D.
Because of pressure to cut down on excessive drinking, pubs in Britain have agreed to stop having Happy Hours with low cost drinks. The drinks will still be cheap, but patrons are no longer allowed to be happy.
Tom Padovano
Tom has sold over 1000 jokes to stand-up comics, ventriloquists, professional speakers, and publications. He has conducted writing seminars in New York and Las Vegas. He's sold comedy scripts and has written a joke book for ventriloquists. He can be reached at: TomComedy@aol.com
Sample of Tom's writing: She was so fat when she wore high heels she struck oil. (sold to Rodney Dangerfield)
I met this woman that was into the new age movement. She told me in her past life she was a dog. I looked at her and said, "Well, some things never change." (sold to Terrill Fisher)
Rocky Graziano always looked up to his opponet. Mainly from the canvas. (sold to Dick Capri for use at a roast for boxer Rocky Graziano roast)
Nancy Jo Perdue
Nancy Jo Perdue has devoted much of her professional life to writing. While working as a journalist for a Hearst-owned daily newspaper in San Antonio, Texas, she began dabbling in comedy writing. After getting her first laugh as a gag writer in the early 1990s, her hobby became a serious business. Nancy Jo uses her comedy writing skills to add humor to speeches, fiction, prose, and stand-up acts. She can be contacted at pnanjo@aol.com
Nancy Jo Perdue Sample Lines: I used to have the world's dumbest secretary. There was only one file in the filing cabinet: "I" for "I don't know where to put this."
It rains a lot in Seattle. But, it's still one of my favorite cities because it's the only place I've ever been where bad hair days are stylish.
I saw Mommie kissing Santa Claus under the mistletoe last night. That confused me because last night was June 12.
John David Sidley
John David Sidley is a performer with a strong background as a comedy writer. He wrote gags for national comics, deejays, and some of his peers, before he ever hit the stage himself. John can be reached at: jdsidley@aol.com
Stan Silliman has written 5000 jokes, 80 song parodies, and 6 books. He has custom written and produced radio commercials and has supplied over 360 humor columns. His column, Silliman on Sports, is carried in over 80 newspapers. To view sample copies, go to www.sillimanonsports.com and to check out his books go to www.comedyempirepress.com. Otherwise Mr. Silliman can be reached at (405) 329-1766.
A sample of Stan's work: I miss Food Lion...expecially their St. Patrick's Day green meat sale.
Wouldn't it be weird if Medusa fell for a guy iwth a head full of mongooses?
Melanie White
Melanie White has been writing comedy for 15 years. She has written jokes for such comedians as Jay Leno and Yakov Smirnoff. Her laugh lines have also been published in magazines like Reader's Digest and Arizona Highways. She can be contacted at scoobyntex@comcast.net
Here is a sample of Melanie’s writing: Our baseball team is so bad that our pitchers hit batters twice as often as our batters hit pitchers.
The best things in life are free . . . ‘cause nobody’s figured out how to put a price tag on ‘em yet.
It’s good that the best things in life are free, especially since the next best things are too expensive for me to afford.
Scott Wood
Scott Wood is being hailed as one of the funniest comedians working today. Known as Mr. Punchline, as well as being called the "New" Rodney Dangerfield, Scott's style of rapid fire one-liners have been keeping audiences rolling in the aisles for more than fifteen years. Scott has appeared on ABC, FOX, the Family Channel, and Comedy Central. You can reach Scott at (951) 485-9200 or cleancomic@hotmail.com
Here is a sampling of Scott's material: My dad never like me. As a child I would wet the bed. He got me an electric blanket.
My wife hates every restaurant I choose. Like the other night, we're sittin' at Hooters....
My sister's trying to lose weight. She said she's fat because of the kids...she adopted.
Would you like to be listed on our Writers Page? This page is available to current subscribers of Round Table. All you need to do is send us a short bio, contact information, and a few sample jokes.